I Think My Phone is Cheating on my Boyfriend (or "If you're going to date via text message, buy some more phone credit you cheapskate!")

Another short anecdote from my favorite source of writing material--you got it: the Jerusalem inner-city bus.

"Do you have a message to send?" the 19-year-old, clean-cut religious girl asked me.
"What?" I replied, taking off my headphones and settling into a seat at the back of the bus.
"Do you have a message to send?" she asked again.
"What are you talking about?" I replied, now fully able to hear her but having no idea what she meant.
"A text message?"
"Oh," I said, "Sure."

Let me insert here that usually I don't let strangers borrow my phone--after you've had a cell phone stolen from your hospital bed in the surgery ward, you become a bit paranoid.

But I figured since it was a text message rather than a phone call, and who knows when one day I would forget my phone at home . . .

"Sure, you can use it," I said, handing her my phone.
Five minutes later, she hands it back.

Now, me, I'm not particularly nosy, but since it took her so long, I was a little curious by this point, imagining that she'd somehow broken into my bank account through my ancient Nokia and was siphoning funds to an unmarked account in the Cayman Islands.

Luckily, the number she sent her message to was in Israel (and even to same cell phone service I have--a discounted charge!), but it's content was of questionable nature. The following is a word for word translation of the message this girl, obviously the next Tolstoy, sent to Mr.X:

"What's up, baby? : q (yes, she did the smiley face upside down) Everything is fine. What how was today HAHA Surviving the army national service Coolness the best It's true Moroccans are crazy about couscous I love it My grandma understands more HAHA A proud Moroccan I love upbeat songs and maybe a little quiet So good luck (or something like that) Return a text message to my cell phone XXXXXXXX Do you come to Jerusalem and I am really looking for a serious relationship not something silly, Name"

So, besides being completely confused by this message, I was in complete shock. A DATING MESSAGE?!? I knew I wasn't handing over my phone for a donation to UNICEF but A DATING MESSAGE?!?

All, I can say is, this is the last time a stranger uses my cell phone to discuss Moroccans' love of couscous . . . I have better things to do with my 25 agurot a text message.